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Help me start recovering - anonymous gay encounters

canuck said:

I've resolved to start the recovery process this year and I'm hoping someone on a similar journey can help with some techniques to begin. I don't name as gay but I employ Grindr for gay hookups when I'm feeling anxious at function or to procrastinate. I'm at a fairly high level of work which gives me flexible time during the day for an encounter. I can sometimes go a few weeks without succumbing but then a miniature crisis arises and I literally can not stop myself. I'll just "take a peek" at Grindr, eventually start a conversation, and if I find someone attractive nearby I find myself arranging to meet knowing it's a bad idea. During the encounter it's honestly like a high and the greatest thing and afterwards I feel horrible, tell myself I'll never perform it again, delete the app, try to focus on other things, yet the desire comes back stronger than ever. I know I have male encounters because they are easier and faster than encounters with women, as I have no longing to date or be with a man. I've admitted to

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